Solving a mystery isn't always an investigator's most difficult job. Breaking down barriers of communication between a private investigator and the police detectives can often be next to impossible. On Sunday, April 3,1994, I was hired by Courtney Love to try to locate her husband, Kurt Cobain.
Since the discovery of Kurt's body on April 8th, my investigation has continued into the mysteries surrounding the event of his death. During the initial phase of this investigation, mistakes were made by the police and by myself. That's going to happen in any complex case.
Attempts may be made to discredit me or the work I've done to distract from what I have to say. If that tactic is attempted by anyone directly involved in this case, a word to the wise, I may take some nicks and scrapes here and there but no matter how much money, power or influence you think you have, you'll be shooting BBs at a cannon.
Kurt Cobain wanted out. He wanted out of performing on tour, he wanted out of his band, he wanted out of the business that was pressuring him to produce his music instead of simply playing. But Kurt Cobain did not want out of life.
Regardless of what the coroner's report might say, Kurt Cobain died Sunday evening, April 3rd or early Monday morning, April 4th. Although he may have been seen at the local park by the lake on Sunday, April 3rd, anyone claiming to have seen him after 7:30 AM on Monday morning is either lying or they don't really exist. Most information about these "witnesses" has been deliberately planted in the media.
At least two people knew Kurt was dead before I was sent to Seattle to search for him on Wednesday, April 6th.
Contrary to the police reports, the note found at the scene was not a suicide note. It was not written to Courtney and Frances. It was a long, detailed letter written to Kurt's fans with a very short footnote to Frances and Courtney.
The letter explained his decision to quit touring and stop performing with his band. Kurt was leaving Seattle to go East and stay with friends. He wanted to be left alone. He didn't want anyone to follow including his wife. That is what this letter is all about. That is ALL this letter is about. The body of the letter was written by Kurt with the exception of the following words added at the bottom, "Which will be so much happier without me. I love you, I love you". Those words appear to have been added by someone else without Kurt's knowledge.
This has been a long and tedious investigation. It has also been a delicate balancing act, staying in a place where I could continue gathering information while at the same time maintaining integrity with regard to one of my clients.
Keep your eyes, ears and minds open. This is not going to float around as just another speculative conspiracy theory. The case is going to be proven and those involved will be prosecuted.
Most parents and others over thirty years of age don't understand what this is all about. They see Kurt's death a "another junkie bites the dust." I probably would have felt the same way if I hadn't become so deeply involved in this case and in the events of Kurt's death.
No one is more anti-drug than I am. What most parents don't understand is that kids didn't look up to Kurt because he used drugs, they looked up to him because of his talent and the fact that he was basically an honest person who didn't believe in corruption which is often brought on by greed and the pursuit of the almighty dollar.
Drug addiction is one of the worst problems our country faces. It's one of the most dangerous and destructive personal problems an individual can have.
But drug addiction is still just a flaw. It's a mistake... it's bad judgement. Kurt wasn't proud of the fact that he was a junkie, but he was honest about it! He didn't like the negative influence he had on kids because of his heroin addiction.
As we throw darts of criticism at the drug addict, how many of us can say that our own flaws and imperfections deserve any less condemnation. I do believe there are some evil self- centered people in the world, but I also believe skid row houses a lot of really good people who've suffered rejection because arrogance has overshadowed compassion.
Most of us were idealists when we were young. The pressures of having to pay bills and support families can sometimes cause people with good intentions to begin compromising values in order to compete with dishonest competitors. Some of us have struggled financially over the years because we've attempted not to give in to those compromises.
Kurt was determined not to let greed control his life. He lost some minor battles on occasion because of pressure from a few of those around him, but flaws and all, this guy was for real! I grew to admire Kurt as I learned more about him.
I've been getting letters from young people who tell me they were so depressed after Kurt's death that they had considered suicide also. I realize several actually have.
Please don't ever allow anything that someone else does to influence you so much that you could take your own life. Never let depression get the best of you. Everyone goes through hard times, but life really is worth living if you make the best of what you've been given.
When you get down, just look around. There's always someone close by who has it a lot worse and has found a way to cope.
You've probably heard this before, but it bears repeating here. Suicide is a PERMANENT SOLUTION to a TEMPORARY PROBLEM.
Keep your eyes and ears open. We're up against some pretty powerful and wealthy people here. This may take some time as we have to slow down occasionally to climb over obstacles put in our way.
It may take some time... but the job WILL get done.
Courtney's personality may be described by reporters and writers as, flamboyant, frivolous, and provocative. But Courtney uses her baby doll appearance, her rambling oratories and her sometimes outrageous behavior to cover a host of psychological problems.
As an investigator looking for answers to a mysterious death, I viewed Courtney from an entirely different perspective than most.
I found Courtney to be extremely intelligent. She's also a psychopath, a pathological liar, and an opportunist who will use anyone and any situation to self-promote her ambitous goals of fame and fortune.
No, I'm not a psychologist. Courtney's unbalanced mental condition is so obvious that I don't believe it takes someone with a degree in psychology to identify the problem. The media may see Courtney as a person who's interesting. I see Courtney as a person who's dangerous.
Courtney's specialty is an uncanny ability to manipulate men to suit her purposes and to serve her needs. She changes her personality like a chameleon. She's adept at becoming the victim whenever she's criticized. She frequently puts on her baby doll act of sweetness and vulnerability while readily admitting, " I never claimed to be an angel." Courtney can cry on a whim. She uses that ability to gain sympathy.
Courtney will also admit to being a liar and an opportunist. She wears these titles as badges of honor, often using her habitual lying as an alibi! This most often confuses the observer. In doing so, she's allowed to get away with her schemes. Her antics are usually excused with a shrug, "Well, that's just Courtney!"
What's really going on inside this chaotic mind? Listen closely while Courtney speaks. Read her interviews carefully. She'll tell you in her own words!
"I finally said, 'I'm not on this earth to f--k a rock star, I'm here to BE a rock star.' I would create myself."
"My goal keeps me alive... But if you think you're going to stop me from going where I'm going, you're not going to do it."
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